Beer, Wings, and Modern Family
It has been a doozy of a year(s).
And I don't know about you, but I feel like I am reeeeeally starting to approach the limit of things I can take. Like, I'm strong...and I am very, very tired.
When my bandwidth is really tapped, my capacity to make decisions deteriorates. So when I start to sense the depletion setting in, I kind of pre-determine certain choices, to spare myself the mental pressure of choosing later.
For example, (almost) every time that I sat down to watch Netflix in the past month, I put on Modern Family.
Why? Because until recently, I hadn't watched it all the way through, there are a hundred seasons of it (so I knew it would last a while) and, it usually makes me chuckle. (This is also why I've watched The Office eleventeen times.)
Without that pre-determined choice, I just can't even. I will scroll the options on Netflix for endless hours without committing, and end up feeling frustrated and overwhelmed instead of relaxing and enjoying it...which defeats the purpose.
The other decision that I let myself pre-make lately was what to eat when I'm at a restaurant. This doesn't work at every restaurant, but there are a few local pub-style places that I frequent, and there are two things that are always on the menu:
Beer and wings.
I know, I know. The school of not-good-enough would probably berate me for the fact that these aren't "healthy" choices and I should probably be doing something "more active" or whatever. But you know what? I'm just not there yet.
Sure, wings don't pack the same nutritional punch as a kale salad or some shit, but you have to walk before you can run, and sometimes you have to lay down on the couch to let an injury heal before you can even start walking.
And there's even room to flex my choice-making muscles when I start to feel more recovered — I can try a new beer, or order a different flavour of wing sauce. SO MANY OPTIONS. But let's not go down that road...yet.
The point is, this isn't forever, it's just for now. And for now...
Self-care looks like beer, wings, and watching Modern Family.
It is meeting my basic needs, and letting that be good enough.
I know I need this reminder almost daily, along with the accompanying permission to tend to my Self where I'm at — not where I think I'd like to be.
If you're not okay, you're not okay. And that's okay.
I've learned that there is more power in owning your truth than hiding behind, "I'm fine," even if that truth-owning happens when you're crying on the floor and wonder if you'll ever get up again. (You will. I promise.)
Until then, your best might not be what you thought your best would be.
And I find that the more that I can make peace with that — and be okay in spite of where I am in the moment — the better I feel...even when I'm laying on the floor.
I have one more thing to share and then I'm going to sign off because honestly, this is the random shit that gives me hope:
So. I had finished the 10 seasons of Modern Family that were available on Netflix as of last week, and moved on to re-watch Schitt's Creek.
But.
I'm convinced that the Universe knew I was having a TIME this week and decided to throw me a bone in the form of releasing the 11th and final season of Modern Family on Netflix. Today.
Logically, I know that this is less than a coincidence — it's two nonsensical and completely unrelated things.
But.
When I tell myself that there is some divine cosmic force that is paying attention to the things that I need and delivering them exactly the moment that I need them...I mean. That's way more fun, feels magical, and it just makes me feel better.
Believing in that kind of serendipity gives me hope when hope is hard to find, and that's good enough for me right now.
Now, I'm going to take a shower and go for a beer. Maybe I'll get even wings. Then I'm going to come home to my weighted blanket and watch some Modern Family.
That's how I'm meeting my needs today, and I'm letting it be enough.
What can you do for your Self?
Until next week,
x J
PS. Remember that presentation I mentioned last week? The one I'm doing on October 19 at 10am PT talking about How to Set Boundaries in Your Life and Business? You should totally sign up.
It's going to be half workshop/presentation and half live Q&A, so if you want to learn more about how setting boundaries + practising Self-care can transform your life/biz and you want to ask me some questions...here's your chance!
Click here to save your seat, and then pass on the info to your business-building friends. This is a virtual event, so we can still get away with saying the more, the merrier! 💪